IT'S TIME TO PRUNE

IT'S TIME TO PRUNE

One of the suggestions I was, and still am often given by directors, editors and mentors during my working life is this…less is usually more. In other words, when given the opportunity to simplify whatever you're involved with…take it. It makes you happier and more effective.

I compare it to pruning a tree. By removing the excess branches, the tree has more energy to bear beautiful blossoms and/or healthy fruit. Your life is no different. When you continually prune the areas not bearing fruit or heading in the wrong direction, you will be able to focus your attention and energy on what matters most.

Granted, “simplifying your life” means many things to different people. Some try to do it by engaging less with living, course not recommended because the whole purpose of being alive is to get more out of the process of living

For others, though, “simplifying” can mean removing unnecessary complication, recalibrating in such a way that you achieve more time for what's important or urgent, less stress, less clutter, fewer bills, fewer relationships that deplete you, less identification, a few less “causes” to fight for, and greater peace of mind. Your personal quest for simplicity may involve one or more of these pursuits. However, I can only share with you what has worked for me, and I hope you can relate. Consider these three basic starter-suggestions:

Say goodbye to “the Joneses”—This was never a big one for me, except in the sense that I wanted people to like me (yes, well I still do, but I'm not as desperate as I used to be.) But I watch other people chasing symbols and reassurances of success with an all-consuming obsession, living an existence that has a very hollow resonance to it when the bell rings for the end of the round. The Joneses focus on living in a larger house in a “better” suburb, driving a more prestigious car, joining the right clubs, getting more “friends” and “likes” on social media, chasing after fame and plaudits and updating your wardrobe. Such pursuits proffer a degree of gratification and shots of self-importance for a while but, like last year's iPhone, indulgence has a short life-span, and delivers no balanced stability or peace of mind when things aren't going so well. Before you make your next acquisition, ask yourself these simple questions:

• Is this something I really need?
• Can I do without it?
• Will it make a permanent positive difference in my life?
• Is it worth the price – the real cost – to me?

Live by the 80/20 Rule—In business, there’s a rule of thumb that twenty percent of the sales people will generate eighty percent of the business, and that eighty percent of your customers will return to you only twenty percent of your rewards. I’ve found both to be true.

I’m suggesting that you apply the rule to your personal life. First, identify the twenty percent of problems that create eighty percent of your stress in life. Then, focus on resolving that problematic twenty percent.

Similarly, only 20% of your acquaintances will qualify as worthwhile friends, yet it's the other 80% who will want to suck up 80% of your time and attention – usually either on trivialities or issues that are really none of your business anyway. If you hadn't realised this before, don't take my word for it. Just be aware, and observe how and which people take up most of your time and demands on your attention. Then decide if your life would benefit from some weeding-out, pruning and culling. I think you'll be surprised at how much clutter you're carrying, and how little of it really belongs at your doorstep.

You’ll be amazed at how much better you’ll feel by making progress on these major issues. I also predict you’ll get a boost in buoyancy even from just making the list.

Unload your emotional baggage—I'm talking about the carry-on stuff that loads you down, takes up space, holds you back, deprives you of contented sleep, obscures who you really are in your heart, and sabotages your noblest efforts. Burdens like hate, jealousy, anger, and resentment can obscure you to the world, wear you out until you get “sick and tired...”, and lower an invisible ceiling on you. Until we let go of our baggage we can never get out from under. Remember, we're like performing fleas – we'll only jump as high as where we think the ceiling is. Repeat to yourself the words of William Ward, “Forgiveness is the key that unlocks the handcuffs of hate.” 

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There is absolutely no shortage of books available on the subject of simplifying your life, and I recommend you get any one that appeals to you, either by title or by author – you really can't make a wrong choice on this.

And until you do start reading and practising how to pare back, you can start your journey by practising the three suggestions, until they become automatic habits. Every time you feel your self getting choked up and burdened down, stand back and take a look at your life. What can I do without here, what can I weed out now, what can I cull, what can I prune? You, your wellbeing and and your attitude will thank you for it, and so will those who are dearest to you.

William James, over a century ago, said, “The greatest discovery of this generation is that a human being can alter their life by altering their attitude.” Over the years I have seen it happen countless times. What most people fail to realise is that your attitude not only impacts your happiness and your success, it also can impact the happiness and success of all the people around you…your family, your friends, and your peers at work. Attitudes pervade the atmosphere around you, and are truly are contagious. From time to time we need to ask ourselves…“is mine worth catching?”

There is no way to overstate the importance of an embracing, creative attitude in your life. However, no one can underestimate the difficulty in maintaining it. It’s not easy, and it’s a very personal thing, but it can be done.

It’s my hope that whatever guide-book you choose to guide you on your journey further will be a useful tool in helping you:

• Manage your energy levels
• Keep your spirit alive and sparking
• Take new paths
• Reduce your debilitating stress levels
• Develop the “Human Touch” – empathy
• Engage with your fears
• Live in awe
• Savour small successes
• Burn brightly without burning out
• Stabilise yourself when the storms blow through