9 HABITS OF PROFOUNDLY POWERFUL PEOPLE

Influential people have a profound impact on everyone they encounter. Well, of course, otherwise they wouldn't be “influential”, right? But how do they do it? Is it an accident of birth and the temperament you were born with? Or are there other factors loose on the landscape?

It might not surprise you to know that powerful people achieve influence with others only because they deliberately and consciously exert so much influence inside, in themselves. You might notice that in writing that last sentence, I deliberately spoke of “influence with” others, rather than “influence upon” them. Right here is the first step; the place where a misstep can send you way off where you want to finish your journey, requiring you later to retrace your steps all the way back to this point.

Power-trippers (tyrants) set out to work ways of lording it over others – of ruling the roost. It's primitive. It's so outdated. And so self-destructive. People don't like being lorded-over and will (secretly) resent you for it, sooner or later turning against you and pulling you back down off your self-made pedestal. Influential people don't rule; they empower, firstly themselves, and then others. If that last bit sounds selfish, let me ask you this – How does anyone give away something they don't have? If you're not empowered within yourself, you cannot empower anyone else. It's not possible. What happens instead is that those you try to “help” end up being dis-empowered – by you. Empowerment, like disempowerment, is infectious. Empowering is an ultimate expression of collaboration.

It follows then that the “Inside-Out” rule of realising power is universal; it applies just as much to life's losers as it does to the movers and shakers. The gift of influencing is graced upon us all; the question you might like to stand in is – Is my influence, that is the quality of energy I radiate, worth catching? Empowering people leave empowered people in their wake. Similarly, bullies and manipulators leave disempowered people behind them. Isn't that what The Man said when he announced “You'll know them by their fruits.” If you want a realistic assessment of what you're good at, look closely at what you leave behind you. How aware you are of the laws of influencing, and how deftly you apply the gift, and how acutely you get wise to the opportunities available to you, how energetically you lean forward into life and apply it intentionally to your inner growth – all these elements are your personal tools for making a difference.

At the other end of the continuum, the amount and quality of the influence we wield is stymied by how much we passively lean back and allow default inner programmes (often negative) to determine how far we'll get with ourselves and with other people. How deeply do we engage with the hand that's been dealt to us, or how much do we lie inert and let life just “happen” to us?

Most people look at a successful person and see only the outside. Somewhere in the negative observer's vocabulary lie thoughts and assumptions of “luck”, “fortune”, “predestination”, “karma”, or “happenstance” Victims see only at some outward manifestations of what's really going on – on the inside. More aware folks see powerful people innovate, speak their mind, and propel themselves forward toward bigger and better things and get actively curious about “How do they do that?” In my mid- twenties I noticed that Influential people have a profound impact on everyone they encounter, and I went a little green with envy. In so doing, I completely missed the point. But sometimes we have to come crashing down before we realise “I've missed something here.” And we have to realise that we've missed the point somewhere along the way before we can get the point. No experience is wasted, unless you say so.

One of my first, surprising discoveries was that, no mater whether we are born introvert or extrovert, the confidence and wherewithal that make a powerful influence possible are earned. It’s a labour of love that influential people pursue behind the scenes, every single day. Most of them don't talk about it much, they just get on with it. But I was lucky enough to get close enough to enough truly influential people who saw something worthwhile in me, and invested their time and secrets.

What ordinary people are influenced by changes more often than the weather, but the unique habits of influential people remain constant. Their focused pursuit of excellence is driven by nine habits that you can emulate and internalise until your influence expands, within and without:

1. Powerful people think for themselves

Influential people attune themselves to shifts, trends and public opinions, but they're not buffeted by them. They form their conclusions carefully, based on an ever-widening awareness and appreciation of both the finer details and the bigger pictures (there's always more than one perspective on everything). They’re more than willing to change their mind when the context and circumstances support it, but they aren’t influenced by what other people think, only by what they are aware of from first-hand experience and exploration. They do not unconditionally accept other people's adjudications, opinions or beliefs. They eschew rushing to judgment and keep a very large “maybe” tray under the bonnet, and allow themselves time explore more widely and deeply. While they are quick to recognise the bleeding obvious, they are often suspicious of situations characterised as something “everybody knows”.

2. Powerful people are graciously disruptive

Influential people are never satisfied with the status quo. They’re the ones who constantly ask, “What if?” and “Why not?” They’re not afraid to challenge conventional wisdom, assumptions about themselves, or what's allowed to go unexamined under the mind-numbing label of “common sense”. Influential people are often troubling, especially to lazy people, but their confronting is not usually confrontational, unless a new idea is met with defenssive stubbornness. Influential people's stirring is characterised by their true motives – they don’t disrupt things for the sake of being disruptive; they do it to unsettle mindsets and make things better.

3. Powerful people inspire conversation

When influential people speak, ideas and conversations radiate outwards like ripples in a three-dimensional pond. Perspectives are shifted. And those ripples are multi directional; influencers challenge and inspire everyone around them to become aware, so that everyone's subsequent actions or lack of actions are at least a matter of conscious choice. Attuned witnesses of an influential person are inspired to explore new ideas, think differently about their work, and they feel supported and empowered to do differently.

4. Powerful people leverage their networks

Influential people know how to co-create and cultivate lasting connections. Not only do they know and touch a lot of people, they get to know their connections’ connections. Most importantly, they add value to everyone in their network, and their network's networks. Influential people are matchmakers. They look for “do-ers”, invite them on board and get them playing with each other. Relentlessly they sort out and cut out those who let life and others “do unto them”. And they don't waste energy feeling bad about that because they know that a Victim will never be stuck for company. Having corralled the right people, influencers share propositions and know-how, and they actively foster connections between people who might benefit from getting to know each other.

5. Powerful people focus only on what really matters

Influential people aren’t distracted by trivialities. They sift out what's important and what's urgent, and they learn the difference between. They’re able to cut through the static and clutter, sift out hierarchies of Importance and Urgency, point them out to everyone else and focus everyone's attention on what matters. Influential people know from real experience the 80/20 Rule in all its permutations, and that time wasted on time-wasters is time you don't get back. They speak only when they have something worthwhile to say, and they never insult sentient people with idle social chit-chat.

6. Powerful people welcome disagreement

They don't spoil for fights – fights are promoted by people who have something to gain by avoiding possible solutions. Powerful people do, however, welcome any opportunity to find out “there's a better way”. They love being booted off a position. They're especially grateful for it if the intervention comes before a Stand is taken. Influential people do not react emotionally and defensively to dissenting opinions—they welcome them. They’re humble enough to know that they don’t know everything, nor that they don't know any one thing from every possible perspective. They welcome dissenting views that deepen their depth of field. They know that someone else might see something they missed. And if that person's view has merit, they embrace the idea wholeheartedly and make space for the new perspective to assimilate into the whole picture. Because they understand the Law of Duality, influential people care more about the end result than about being “right”.

7. Powerful people are proactive

Influential people don’t wait for things like new ideas and new technologies to find them; they pull back the curtains, open the doors and windows and seek those things out. These early adopters always want to anticipate what’s next. They’re influential because they see, in the presumption of Infinite Possibility in which they live, what might be coming, and they see what’s actually coming before anyone else because their eyes (and all their other sensory organs) are peeled and they're intentionally look for it. Then they spread the word.

8. Powerful people respond rather than react

This is a “biggie”. Influential people have prepped themselves by working long and diligently to free themselves from childhood habits of knee-jerk reacting. They have created themselves to become response-able. With the realisation of Influence they've accepted that the gift comes with a Responsibility – “I'm not in a vacuum here. Whatever I do next is going to have consequences.” When they do make a mis-take, they acknowledge it, make amends, repair the damage and move on more aware. If someone criticises an influential person for making a mistake, or if someone else makes a critical mistake, influential people don’t react like apes – immediately and emotionally. They wait. They think. And then they deliver an appropriate response that will turn the crisis into an opportunity. If someone stuffs up, they look first at the system before blaming the person. If systemic adjustments are needed, they identify them, tell everyone about them and implement them. If the system is fine and the failure happened because the person failed, then an influential person turns that moment into one of growth for everyone involved. Influential people know how basic and important relationships are to liveliness, and they won’t let an emotional overreaction harm theirs. They also know that emotions are contagious, and overreacting has a negative influence on everyone around them.

9. Powerful people do not rely upon belief; they get to Know.

Influential people always expect the best, or something better. Knowing their weaknesses, they trust their strengths and their own power to author-ise and achieve their dreams, and they real-ise for others that they share that same power. They know that everything is available; that nothing is out of reach, and that trust inspires those around them to stretch for their own goals. They've done the work, studied the metaphysics, and see daily evidence that one person does change the world. The only questions are “How?” and “How much?”

Bringing It All Together

To increase your influence, you need first to gather your self together, gather all the resources and companions you'll need then, from that fullness, to freely and passionately share your skills and insights in your pursuit of a grander future.