PITY

Self-Pity sucks.
It is a ploy to wangle love out of an "other".
It doesn't work --
The best a self-pitier can hope for in return
Is Pity.
Giving Pity to a self-pitier
Is as good as giving blood to Dracula.

Pity sucks, too.
Pity is the false love of do-gooders,
Wet and sticky.
Pity doesn't nourish, or bring happiness to either party.
The pitier feels -- I don't know -- somehow sanctified,
While the Pitied one goes on drowning in even more ooze.
Out of Self-Pity we finish up back in self-pity,
Wallowing in a reality
In which we can feel so sorry for ourselves
That surely some saviour will notice we're drowning
And come to rescue us.
Self-Pity, and its bastard half-sibling, Self-Importance
Are Class-A Ir-responsibility.

A giver of Pity should be treated with the utmost suspicion.
Pity is sentiment
Bestowed by someone "higher" upon some poor unfortunate "lower" being.
There's nothing noble about Pity.
There is nothing of one's self given away in Pity,
And the person pitied is created as dis-abled.
And if you think they can't pick up on that, you're dreadfully mistaken.
People who pity often cop later resentment from the people they pity,
And wonder why.
Once or twice since my heart surgery,
I've been on the receiving end of someone's Pity.
I know it has been well-meant, but I've still felt abused,
And I emotionally withdraw from it.
My friends don't pity me, thank God;
They support me.
That's a very different thing.

When I find myself sinking in Pity for someone else's misfortune,
I find I'm reassuring myself that "I'm really a kind, caring person".
I'm pitying for my own self.
Why would I need that kind of reassurance?

Empathy is very different from Pity.
Empathy is Love invested;
There is evenness and engagement
One with the other.

If you can't avoid it in the moment,
Go ahead and pity your enemies,
But be aware;
Pity separates.

Never, ever pity your friends --
Love them;
Love unifies.