TAKE A LOAD OFF

Why so sad? 

I get that there is something sweet and seductive about sadness. And there's nothing wrong with surrendering to that experience, but as a chronic state of being, sadness becomes debilitating -- for everyone concerned.

What will not help you, though, is any effort to “snap out of it.” That's as ineffective and harmful as trying to will yourself out of a sink-hole of quicksand.

Firstly, know this – little sadnesses in daily life get brushed under the carpet, and their bodily and mental symptoms build up in your body. One day something will trigger your Sad switch, and the whole lot starts boiling up to the surface. The only way to prevent such an eruption is to prevent the build-up by giving your little daily troughs of a “downer” the space to be in your awareness. When sad comes up, feel into it. Enjoy it if you can.

In the meantime, though, if it comes time for a good cleanse, sit quietly for a while and go back over old grievances. Who has hurt you? What triggered Hurt? Feel into every grievance that pops to mind.

Then forgive them. This takes time; don't try to rush it. Set aside time and space to write a personal letter to someone who has aggrieved you. Firstly explain why you're writing the letter. Secondly explain what it is that you're resenting. Be very specific. Then end on a positive note. Tell this person what you admire about them, and what you are grateful for in your relationship with him/her. Thank them for listening to you and wish them well for their future.

Finally, and this is a “must”, read the letter aloud to yourself. Be with your experience. Don't hurry it.

Do a different letter for each person against whom you hold grievance.

You may never send these letters; you are writing them for you. You are practising Forgiveness. But if I'd told you that at the start, you'd probably have said “No way!!” Right?